I'm guessing it's common knowledge here that porcupines eat chairs.

Two nights ago, my gf and I were watching some stand-up comedy, specifically Russel Peter, on Youtube. The windows behind the couch look out to the front porch, and coming from outside we heard a terrifying grinding sound. We were alone in this huge house and we were warned that we had to be extra careful this weekend because a lot new people would be in town for the holiday, and if anyone wandered up our driveway it would be wise to have the doors locked.

Hearing the slow scraping of wood just outside our window set the scene for an awful horror movie, in our minds.

I turned off the lights in the living room and crept to the door's window. Peeking out, I couldn't see anything, but the noise was loud and unusual. Then a small black object on the far corner of the porch caught my eyes. It was moving, hunched over on a chair.

Squinting I could make out spikes, and the creature turned to look at the door with black beady eyes. I shuddered.